No "News" is Good News


There's rarely any good news on 'the News' because, frankly, bad news sells better. Television and radio news shows are productions, just like "Survivor" or "The Apprentice". And just like everything else on the air, they need ratings to stay afloat. Ratings = Commercials = Money.

And to get those all-important ratings, they need to keep people interested. Viewers, by and large, don't really care if the space shuttle launch went well, or if the Pandas at the zoo are expecting a baby, or if a local man won the lottery – they want stories that make them feel better about their own lives.

They want to hear that the President said something stupid, so they feel smarter. They want to find out about Britney's latest breakdown, so they can feel that, even though they don't have her money, they have a better life than her. They want to hear about tax increases so they can complain about how all the world is 'keeping them down'.

They want to see other people fail, so they don't feel like failures themselves.

If only the ultra-negative world would just back off, they say, they'd be rich and famous too. If the world were a more positive place, filled with hope and joy, then we could all 'get ahead'.

But, in typical human fashion, the average viewer has no real interest in actually doing anything about any of these things. They just want more material to complain about during their lunch breaks tomorrow. They say they want the world to be happier, but all they really want to do is whine and spread the misery, hoping for some super-messiah to come along and save them – just as long as they don't have to lift a finger.

Viewers don't want to make their own lives better, they want to be elevated to an exalted status without actually doing anything. The world owes them, after all, and someday everyone will see how great people they are for being "normal".

All hail mediocrity, be a simple kind of man, the meek shall inherit the Earth, and all that. Don't strive to be great – just vegetate. You can't be a failure if you fail to try, right?

Not everyone is so lazy, so selfish, and so callous as all that – but the majority are. And that's who 'the News' caters to. They are in business to make money, above all else, and misery sells. It is, after all, what people want most in their lives.